July 13, 2020

Rubi Chakravarti and her most loved avatar as a mum

She is an individual who carries the image of being outspoken, funny and courageous. She surely dons all the roles efficiently but a meeting with Rubi Chakravarti makes one realize she is soft spoken, loves the title of being a mom and is quite simple in life.

Rubi Chakravarti is a noted celebrity, someone who voices her opinion strongly and has been conferred numerous awards for her achievements in theatre and the world of entertainment.

We at Mums and stories are happy to feature this awesome story of an interesting mum.  It is as though there are many layers of her personality which people don’t perceive her to be unless she intends to break the barrier.

“I was the youngest in my home. Whenever people around me would ask what I wanted to be when I would grow up, I would reply “I want to be a mom”. After meeting with several frowns I started saying complicated designations like I wanted to be an ‘astrophysicist’ or something like that. In my heart I loved and even now love the most being a mom to my children.

My father Brigadier Bhrama Mohan Chakravarti and my mother Ayesha Sikander Hyat Khan got married in London against all odds in 1947! My dad the eldest of seven brothers was a Bengali Brahmin, and my mother was the youngest of a huge Pathan family had lineage belonging to the French as well.

We were brought up as Indians and the only religion we knew was love love and more love.  They rejected everything ritualistic and respected all religions.

They were rebels born before their time. Surely they were wonderful emancipated empathetic and beautiful human beings who lived life whole and complete and full of love. I am honoured to be born to them…and I hope they are proud of me.

When I had turned to be an adult I was a criminal lawyer by profession and somehow the profession never really brought out the true essence in me. I was married too early but didn’t really have kids in early phase of marriage. For sometime I was torn as to be this mother or pursue a career. I also realized that I was looking for a nanny who would replace me and look after my kids like I did. It dawned to me soon enough that that would never happen. Luckily I stumbled on a profession that allowed me to reinvent myself in various forms and be with the kids too.

I was actually in my 40’s when my children were young that I came across new career options like acting and sooner than I realized I was doing plays, stand-up comedies and everything that made me feel good.

 

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I would always tell my kids and even now mention it to them that no matter what happens in life, no matter where they are; when they have to reach out to me, I will be there for them. This I would tell to my daughter when she was studying in college too. Anytime they had to reach out to me she could without being judged or questions asked.  I think it is very important for parents to build that trust in children for them to come and share anything.

I have always been a MOTHER to my kids. We get along well great but I didn’t ever want to be their best friend. They are proud of me and have their personalities in their own right. They are doing well in life professionally and I believe they are emotionally balanced too.

I believe we as people should lead our children by example. I love where I am and let me be honest, it hasn’t been easy. I have worked for it over the years. Most people don’t see certain shades of me but I am very spiritual too. I can also cry at the drop of a hat which is contradictory of being a professional as a stand up comedian.  People see me as this bold, outspoken individual which I won’t deny too.

I feel when you desire something strongly; the world surely gets together to make it happen. It is a second chance in my life that I am living to the fullest.

Long ago when I was just starting out, a review came after the play came out saying ‘A star is born’. I have been conferred many awards and received immense adulation from people for which I am grateful for but I know it hasn’t been easy.

We as mums are forced to multi-task. When the kids were young, I had to formulate my own support group. But staying in Bangalore, as compared to any other city has given me enough space that I cherish and look forward to do something new quite often”

Rubi’s daughter Alisha says, “ Mum was there every time we wanted her to be with us. Anything we wanted as a meal or when we were sick or at school; she was with us. She never made us feel she was a celebrity. It was only later we started realizing she was quite popular. Right through my teens I did have many arguments with her like all daughters would have with their moms but only later in my early twenties I started realizing that all that she said was true and she just wanted us to be safe and happy. She has been a counselor for everything we wanted to query in life.”

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Her son Adnan has interesting perspectives on his mum, “We’ve never grown up with the feeling that mom was a superstar or celebrity- she’s always been mom to us. She’s been there to every soccer game, every sports day, every debate, every PTA and graduation. There has never been a time when I couldn’t count on her for anything! Of course once we got a little older, we started going out with her and that’s when I truly realized how famous my mom is! Everyone wanted her picture, everyone wanted to know her or talk to her- she lights up any room she walks into. Now Alisha and I do occasionally do some name dropping when we want to get into a packed restaurant or club (which she completely detests and shames us on!

She always pushed us to be the best versions of ourselves and encouraged and picked us up whenever we fell along the way. That’s genetic! My grandparents, aunts and uncles and cousins are exactly the same way- we work hard and dream big! My grandfather was the founder/director of LRD in India and chief advisory to the Gandhis. He was probably the most intelligent man in India at the time- he had an engineering and law degree at the same time. It’s only obvious for his family to try and carry on his legacy

I not sure if people don’t already know this about her- but mom is a very emotional person. She wears her heart on her sleeve and has an enormous heart! She is the most selfless and giving person, the most loyal friend and the most loving to her friends and family. Many people see her strong shell, but she’s as fragile and soft internally as she is hard externally!

She’s also an amazing cook- she’s like the Indian Nigella Lawson.”

Mums and stories wishes this awesome family the very best in life.

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