Vedaprana Purkayastha on being a mum and blogger

Meet a parenting blogger, Vedaprana Purkayastha, a mum and a digital media editor by profession, a passionate blogger and someone who believes to be an empowerer with many dreams with women folk and expects to achieve them all in the near future.

She likes to describe herself as a mother, wife and as a thinker or a day dreamer. “I am an affable and agreeable woman who is easily approachable by one and all. An enormous storehouse of secrets, I am a person who is trusted by both friends and strangers.”

“My childhood, as I remember now, can be summarised in three words – family, friends and fun. Though I come from a nuclear family, yet we were surrounded by relatives all year round. And the neighbourhood where I grew up and the friends that we had were more like a family to us. Born to very progressive and liberal parents, I have always had been allowed to be myself; and had the freedom to choose my own paths and build my own destiny.

I was in US when my daughter was born, in 2009. With none around to help or guide, I spent my first couple of months in anxiety, with a constant guilt of not doing things right. Also post partum blues had taken over me and I suffered quite a bit due to both mental and physical stress. My husband tried his best to help me but I missed my parents a lot. But we were blessed with awesome friends who stood sentinel with us.

Urban India pregnancy care has improved a lot and I personally wouldn’t say there is much difference with US if you have the ability to pay those huge bills. Rather I would, at any point of time, prefer India than abroad, because of the support of friends and family that we get here. But one thing that must be mentioned is their happy demeanour – the nurses and doctors in my personal experience are too sweet, patient and caring unlike in India, where they hardly have time for the patients (exceptions are always there though).

Motherhood is the most esteemed topic that ever existed. You will get to hear stories on how blissful this journey is but nobody talks about its darker side. It takes a toll on a new mum, both physically and mentally. Postpartum depression is so much on rise. No one prepares you for the depth of sacrifice you might have to make, and the pains and exhaustions associated with it. It’s not an easy ride as it might look from far because once you step into it, there is no looking back, EVER. And hence one should choose it wisely and be ready to take up all the challenges it throws at her.

I am a mom blogger. I write when I want people to know about my thoughts on topics that are rarely talked about. When everyone writes about the achievements of their kids, I would prefer to write about my kid’s failures. Being open about things that most other people try to hide is what I consider to be my biggest strength.

I want my daughter to grow up as an independent and sensible human being. I want her to be strong enough to choose her own battles and brave enough to fight against all odds of life.”

Talking on parenting blogs and online content Vedaprana shares, “Whether I trust parenting blogs or not, depends solely on its contents. What could work for one mother might not work for me, but it’s always nice to know others’ perspectives. “

Reminiscing her childhood years to the stay in Bangalore right now she shares, “ Bangalore is very different from the place I was brought up, though it has changed a lot over years. Our lives now are way too mechanical and I hardly get time to go out and chit chat with my neighbours, which used to be the most common and favourite thing when we were young. I don’t see any hope, ever, to form such relations in Bangalore.

I take guidance from my mom all the time, not that I follow everything she says. She has been a wonderful mom, extremely patient and our best friend always and I wish I could be 20% like her. But I am stricter and over disciplined at times, which I realize, sometimes result in unwanted consequences.

As a parenting writer, I definitely get to know a lot of things, also learn to look at things from completely different perspectives but as I have mentioned earlier, most of the times I realize we all are in different boats and hence it’s important to understand our waves before sailing. No situations or no experience can ever be compared and thus carving one’s own path is always the best.”